Friday, August 30, 2013

Envious.....Not Jealous

My ex and I on our wedding day in Panama City, FL

I refuse to get into the reasoning behind my divorce and how I pretty much got screwed out of a lot of things. But I will get into how I handle the emotions of having my child around my ex's new girlfriend(s).
There is one girl friend, I do not mind my son around. Even though she is partially the reasoning for my divorce, she is still my friend as we have mended the past and moved on. There is another girl that is also a girlfriend that I really could care less if my child is around her. I am not jealous of her one bit. I am, a bit, envious.
That girl is the first thing my son sees when he wakes up and the last thing he sees before he goes to sleep. That makes me envious of her. I have an empty bed here at home. That bed is only filled every other weekend, some holidays and one month out of the summer. (I told you I got screwed out of a lot....including the custody of my own child).
That girl is there to make my son's school lunches, take him to school, pick him up from school, and take him to the community pool. We have a pool in our backyard so we only have to go a few feet to get to that. I pick my son up from school if I am available to on the weekend's I have him. I never know about how he is doing in school unless I talk to him over the phone. I never get to hear him say "I miss you" or "I love you" unless it is over the phone. All those little things are actually big things.
Last year, this girl and I got in a huge fight but really it was over something EXTREMELY dumb and she just kept holding that cloud over her head. No matter how many times I explained myself, I could not get through to her. She then was determined to make my life a living nightmare after that. Making sure that my ex followed the divorce papers TO THE WORD and making sure that SHE had control over everything. That is when I became not to like her.
Now a days, she will text me photos of my son (if I ask her to) and occasionally when we all get together for dinners and get togethers, she tries to be social but I still hold that grudge. The grudge of saying "Remember, I love you" and telling my son what to do....all in front of me. That is a mother's job. She is not his mother. I understand she is in my child's life but she has been in and out of my ex's life so many times. She is not a stable person in his life.
I guess what really matters is that my son thinks she is nice (at times). He sometimes talks about how she grounded him for silly things that I would have just punished him some other way for. Hey, some of us know how to parent and others don't. I am not saying she does not know how but sometimes she seems to go to the extreme from what I hear. I, do, appreciate all she does for my son but I wish, at times, it was just me and no other woman.

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

So Many Changes

I am sorry my fellow readers that I have left you hanging since Breastfeeding Week. I totally did not mean to do that. I am usually writing a blog entry every day if not at least a couple times a week but I have been so pre-occupied, I forgot. Please, forgive me!

The new news is that I resigned from my call center job. I was there almost a year and a half and made the decision...the hard decision to leave. The hours were great.........for someone that has older kids. I have a brand new baby (well, really he is now 11 weeks now. Where did that time go?) and working 10am to 7pm Monday through Friday is not ideal. I was then offered up a part time position working 11am to 4:30pm. Okay, somewhat better hours but the problem lies in the fact that I have no transportation and I do not have a reliable sitter. I do not feel secure putting my child or any of my children in daycare for the simple fact of all the horror stories you hear and see about on the news. NO THANK YOU!!! So, at the moment, I am plugging away and sending resumes and emails out every day to jobs that offer any position after 4pm and with a decent pay plus health/dental benefits.

We had a photographer from Our365 Portraits come to our house earlier this week to take some photos of Baby T. I have to admit, I am shocked that he did so well. Speaking of the photographer. Ha ha! Baby T is a happy baby and being that he had a bath that morning, had some "boobie juice" (as the Big Kahuna father in law calls it) and had a small-ish nap, he was ready to go with some pictures. I am a bit bummed we only did one outfit and then just him in his diaper but I am very happy with the outcome. Several hundred dollars later, we have a disc of the photos coming in the mail sometime next week that we can make whatever prints and how ever many prints and sizes we want at our own cost and choice!

Speaking of Baby T, he is wanting to crawl so badly. When you put him on his tummy, he kicks his legs and pushes but he isn't going anywhere. He can turn himself around but not quite crawl or scoot. That is, unless you put your hand behind his feet and he pushes off of them. He is only 11 weeks old. He doesn't need to be doing that just yet.

Also, he had his first giggle. Or so I like to think. I am his mother, of course I am going to say he giggled. He has even rolled over from his tummy to his back. Some may not think that is a big deal as it could be easy to do that but every milestone is a big deal to me.

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

World Breastfeeding Week

August 1-7 is World Breastfeeding Week. Baby T is my second baby but my first breastfed baby. We have our latch issues but we manage to maneuver holds so it is easy for the both of us.

August 1--Pro Breastfeeding Wear
Baby T doesn't have any cute breastfeeding shirts but his Nana gave him a funny "unloading" shirt and the one day I put him in it, he unloaded a diaper almost every hour!

August 2--Breastfeeding Tattoos
I don't have any tattoos symbolizing breastfeeding but I do have a tattoo on my left wrist that says "Love" that I see each time I nurse on that side. I got the tattoo after my divorce to symbolize that I can love and I am loved.  

August 3--Nursing in Public
I have yet to accomplish this. I have nursed in our backyard as well as in the front seat of our car many times but not yet in public.

August 4--Peer Counseling 
If it wasn't for all the Facebook groups dealing with Breastfeeding, the forum Justmommies , my in-laws, my husband as well as the Lactation Consultants at the hospital, I am not sure where I would be in my breastfeeding journey. 

August 5--Big Latch On
I did not participate in the Big Latch on in our area due to the fact I was setting up Bub's birthday party. It was early the same morning at our local Babies R Us actually on August 3rd from 10:30-11am. I was nursing during that time of the Big Latch on, though as that is typically Baby T's nursing time. 

August 6--Grown Nurslings
Bubs was not breastfed. He is very interested in everything that goes alone with Baby T being breastfed.

August 7--Babywearing
Baby T's great grandpa sent some money down in a "welcome baby" card so I took some of that money and bought a Moby Wrap for him. I have only worn him a few times as it has been TOO hot here in Dallas to wear him around. Today, though, he isn't fighting being in the Moby except when he gets hot or uncomfortable. 

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Avengers Assemble

Happy Birthday to Bubs! He is turning 7 and to celebrate he wanted an Avengers birthday party. It was all family that showed up but we had a blast anyways. Silly string wars, unpoppable bubbles (bubbles would not pop), swimming, hamburgers/hot dogs, and CAKE...who could ask for more!?!?!

I am addicted to Pinterest so much so they need a Pinterest Anonymous class. I thank everyone I stole ideas from! HA!
We had a Capt America fruit and cheese platter, Hulk Punch (which was just Hawaiian Fruit Juice), Iron Man jello cups as well as Thor Hammers! I even took the time and spray painted t-shirts (also an idea stolen from Pinterest)!

Capt America Fruit and Cheese Tray

Hulk Punch

Iron Man Jello (was red and yellow...hard to see at this angle)

Birthday Cake from Walmart...was pretty darn good!

Birthday Boy got silly string'd


Me, Myself, and I

I am "BoyMama" (not my real name!)
I am going to be 30 in a few months. Can I start going backwards on the birthdays? I have 2 sons. I have been married once before for 6 years. I plan on making this marriage last a lot longer than that! I am a customer service representative for a mail order pharmacy but hoping to find something closer to home with better hours to suit being a new mommy again. I am also a photographer so I will always be posting photos so be prepared for that.

AJ is my husband, my best friend and the one man who can annoy me to the point it is hilarious. He will be 30 as well in a few months but I don't think he cares! He likes anime, comic books, superheros....well anything nerdy/geeky!! 

 Bubs is my 7 year old son. He is my superhero in many ways. He will be going into 1st grade and loves to play with remote controls of any kind, loves watching cartoons, playing video games, swimming and riding his bike.

Baby T is my newest addition. He is 2 months. Baby T is already scooting while on his tummy, holds his head up, and loves sticking his tongue out. He is breastfed and loves "mama milk"!

Hey, You Found Me!

Hello, and welcome to my soon to be very crazy and hectic blog. I am not sure how you stumbled upon me but thanks for taking the time to check it out!
I am a mom of 2 boys....crazy I know but I am so deeply in love with them. I am also married....again!
My husband, AJ, is just 2 months older (to the day) than I am and I like to call him my nerd. He is into anime, comics, video games, etc. He loves comic-cons and I got to experience my first one last year with him. It was quite fun I have to admit. My husband and I met in high school but never dated...thought about it though but obviously didn't think too hard about it as it never happened! We got back in touch during my separation from my first husband via Facebook (what a wonderful tool that is to finding people!) After being together for at least a year and finding out we were pregnant....we got married. It wasn't a necessity but we did it anyways....just because we love each other so much we want to annoy each other for the rest of our lives.
My first son, Bubs, (not his real name) is 7 and a big super hero fanatic. We just celebrated his 7th birthday with an Avengers birthday party. He likes Batman (wonder where he got that from!...nope not the husband....not his dad....but ME!) He also likes Spiderman and Iron-Man. Well, anything superhero. He is a water baby in the sense he is 7 and can swim like a fish....deep underwater. He had to teach me to swim underwater! Sad, I know but I made my little man proud! He is only with me part time due to the divorce but I cherish every moment I have with him.
My youngest son, LoveBug, (again, not his real name) is only 2 months old and a precious angel at that. He shares a birthday with his cousin only 1 month and 1 day after my grandmother passed. We say she had a hand in it! He loves talking to inanimate objects (although we say he is talking to the angels) and he loves sticking out his tongue! I will get him hooked on Batman and any other superhero he prefers to like!
All in all, I am a boy's mom and I love being one. I love getting my hands dirty, buying boys' clothes and not having to worry about all those girly things!!!
I love all of my boys and now you are here to join me in my journey and life of being a mom and wife!